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Our Marriage Waited 20 Years for Full Financial Benefits: A 1995 Story

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  • Once our marriage in California turned legally recognized at the federal level in 2015, we were able to start filing our taxes jointly.
  • Getting married has enabled us to enjoy shared health insurance benefits.
  • Having the legal right to marry ensures our spousal property rights, which gives me a sense of financial security.

It has been nearly a decade since the federal government officially acknowledged my marriage, and it’s simple to grow indifferent and lose sight of how things were prior to this recognition.

Nevertheless, it's crucial to keep in mind everything I have achieved. In 2022, the conservative-dominated Supreme Court indicated its readiness to remove the ability of same-sex couples to get married Here are some of the numerous monetary benefits of marriage that remain intact.

Submitting a combined tax filing

When my partner and I chose to get "married" back in 1995—by leaping over a broom since legal marriage wasn’t an option for us—it was painful to mark “single” on our tax forms as it felt degradingly false; yet, we were compelled to do so because the government did not acknowledge our union.

In 2008, the California Supreme Court made same-sex marriage legal, so we got officially married in our home state. Nonetheless, our journey was far from over.

Prop 8 passed in November 2008, making same-sex marriage once again illegal in California. Our tax returns got really complicated. We could file jointly in California, but the federal government still considered us single, so our tax preparer had to reconcile the numbers between our two returns, costing us extra money in tax prep.

In 2015, the U.S. Supreme Court legalized same-sex marriage nationally, and that's when my wife and I started to truly reap the benefits of marriage.

Most married couples save money filing taxes jointly , and that's certainly been true for my wife and me. We saved on taxes when she returned to school while I was working. We saved when I made a career change, and my earnings dipped for a while.

Best of all, we can check the "married" box on our tax returns and every other form.

Pre-tax insurance

Currently, I am covered under my wife’s employer-sponsored health insurance plan, with the premium deducted pre-tax. This allows her to avoid paying income tax on those expenses, which saves us approximately $12,000 annually in taxes.

Prior to our official wedding, my spouse received healthcare coverage from their employer, though they weren’t allowed to include me under their plan. The insurance company had discretion over recognizing same-sex couples, and in this case decided against doing so. Since I couldn't afford individual insurance back then, I remained without coverage. When she left her job to pursue graduate studies, I managed to get her covered by my workplace’s insurance; however, I ended up having to pay taxes on those benefits since the federal authorities did not acknowledge our marital status.

Being able to share coverage benefits our physical and financial health.

Owning property together

In 2004, when we purchased our condominium, we hadn’t yet gotten legally married, which meant the title company couldn't handle the deed on their own. We needed to seek legal advice to ensure our ownership was documented in a manner that granted us rights similar to those of spouses, adding an additional cost not faced by married couples. Currently, our deed accurately represents our marital status.

In California, which operates as a community property state, assets obtained during the marriage are considered jointly owned by both partners. This encompasses items beyond just real estate. While working for a lawyer who assisted same-sex couples with their wills and estates prior to marriage being legally recognized nationwide, I encountered instances where discriminatory relatives would sometimes claim everything inside an apartment following the death of one partner in the relationship. In such situations, lacking proper legal protections could leave the surviving individual without recourse. will , which numerous individuals lack, the surviving partner possessed no entitlements to the belongings within their shared residence. Currently, marriage safeguards our rights concerning our communal assets.

Freedom from financial fear

After the decision to legalize same-sex marriage in 2015, I felt like a full citizen for the first time. I didn't recognize the base level of financial insecurity I had lived with until it was gone.

I enjoy the chance to live a moderately ordinary and somewhat uneventful life, irrespective of my marital status. In the future, I plan to keep enjoying the economic advantages of marriage, such as spousal retirement benefits. Social Security and my wife's pension.

However, if our rights and the acknowledgment of our marriage come under threat, I'll be at the forefront once more, combating the issue.

  • Finding a financial advisor It doesn’t have to be complicated. With SmartAsset’s free tool, you can quickly connect with up to three fee-only financial advisors who service your local area. These advisors have undergone scrutiny from SmartAsset and adhere to a fiduciary standard, ensuring they always put your needs first. Start your search now.
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